Published inILLUMINATION·3 days agoMember-only8 Things I Learned In Therapy That Helped Me Navigate My Recovery From Narcissistic AbuseThe fact that I write this after so long reminded me of the insidious nature of narcissistic abuse — Silence is an unspoken rule in a narcissist’s household. The scapegoat is expected to keep up the act of everything being absolutely okay while their own helplessness keeps simmering under the surface. It took me a long time to come to terms with the fact that my abuser never wanted…Narcissism6 min readNarcissism6 min read
Published inILLUMINATION·Aug 19Member-onlyThe Locked DoorOpen the door and there’s your Pandora’s box — When you lock a room for long enough, you forget there’s something behind it. You start to see the locked door as part of the wall. Your heart can sometimes feel like that locked door, a forgotten part of an old ancestral home you inherited — a lot of trauma…Mental Health2 min readMental Health2 min read
Published inPublishous·Aug 6Member-onlyThree Traits of Narcissistic Parents to Help Victims Identify Abusive Patterns In Their RelationshipsBy someone who has experienced it firsthand — I was raised in a household with a narcissistic parent. Until a couple of years ago, I didn’t have a term for how I felt about my mother’s abusive behaviour that had gone on for decades. Even a few years after I first started going to therapy, I was hesitant…Narcissism7 min readNarcissism7 min read
Jan 23Member-only𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗴𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝗳𝗳𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝘂𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 “𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝘀𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗼𝘂𝘀”Even Jacinda Ardern hasn’t had it easy — Someone on Twitter was going on about how their team shows up to work even on holidays and those who aren’t doing so are clearly indicating they’re not serious about the job. Here’s why they’re dead wrong - No matter what anyone says, no two people have the same number…Work Life Balance2 min readWork Life Balance2 min read
Oct 3, 2022Member-onlyThe most unbearable thing about grief is not the grief itself, but how people tend to minimize itA recent loss got me thinking about grief. Since the time I lost my grandmother at the age of five, I’ve noticed that grief is one of the most uncomfortable emotions people experience. Both the people impacted by it directly and those who have to show up to offer their…Mental Health2 min readMental Health2 min read
Aug 28, 2022How Startup Founders Can Avoid Burnout (By Not Creating A Toxic Work Culture For Themselves & Others)Someone recently asked this question on LinkedIn on one of Adam Grant’s posts on burnout. The first thing is to recognize that YOU are the founder. You. NO ONE, and I repeat, NO ONE, will ever be as invested in your business as you will be. You might eat, sleep…2 min read2 min read
Aug 18, 2022Member-onlyDay 3: 3 Crucial Mistakes At Work That Will Lead You Straight To BurnoutTake it from someone who learnt this the hard way — you spend way more time recovering from burnout than you do burning out. I worked at the last job I burned out working in for only 4 months and spent the next 8 months recovering from it. …Burnout2 min readBurnout2 min read
Aug 16, 2022Member-onlyDay 2: 3 Topics I Am Exploring In My Life Right NowThere are 3 topics I am actively thinking about a lot these days: Topic #1: Stress Having actively navigated it in the last couple of years, I am interested in Stress because it makes me mad that most organizations do not actively focus on stress. My hope is to educate and work with…Mental Health2 min readMental Health2 min read
Aug 14, 2022Member-onlyDay 1: Why I’m Starting To Write OnlineI recently signed up for Dickie Bush & Nicolas Cole’s cohort-based course, Ship 30 for 30. Here are a few reasons why: I’ve identified as a writer since I was 14. Yet, what I haven’t been doing consistently is the deed itself — writing. Consistency is a key reason why I’m here. Accountability — The last…1 min read1 min read
Published inWriters’ Blokke·Jun 10, 2022Member-onlyThe Cherry Tomato and the YakuzaHave you ever walked into a garden that didn’t get watered enough? Where the plants and shrubs shrivelled up and died eventually because someone didn’t pay enough attention. The tendrils that once wrapped themselves longingly over the stick someone planted so they were supported, now hang their heads droopily, dead…Shame3 min readShame3 min read